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A wedding should be a joyous occasion. But if you have a parent or other family member who has recently died, it can be hard to find the appropriate way to remember them without ruining the celebratory mood. I've put together a list of ways to honor a deceased parent at a wedding. Some of them are more subtle remembrances, others outwardly honor a late relative in a public way. Hopefully any of you facing this difficult situation will be able to find a helpful solution.

How to Honor a Dead Parent or Other Relative at Your Wedding

Some of the best ideas on this have come from readers. Read their plans on respectful ways to honor deceased parents, and then share your ideas.

Comments

November 9, 2006 at 10:21 am
(1) Barbara says:

My father died about 8 months before my wedding, so he couldn’t walk me up the aisle. I walked up alone, and carried one of his silk handkerchiefs – boy did I need it!

November 9, 2006 at 10:24 am
(2) Max says:

My wife’s father died 2 years b4 wedding – so for the father-daughter dance she dance with her mother! and played dad’s favortie song.

November 11, 2006 at 9:03 pm
(3) Joan says:

My older brother will stand in for my dad who died 2 years ago.We will play a special song by Heartland “I loved her first” I am getting married Dec. 23, 06 to my best friend.

November 13, 2006 at 10:16 am
(4) Robin says:

My daughter who was very close to her Grandma wants to leave 2 empty chairs for Grandma and Papa at her weeding.

November 13, 2006 at 11:57 pm
(5) Melissa says:

My father and my older bother have bothed passed away. I also have a close friend and my fiances aunt and grandparents who have passed away. I am honouring them in two ways..the first, I have taken picture charms with pics of them and I will be placing them in my bouquet. Second, before the ceremony begins my mother and my future mother-in-law will come to the front of the church and light candles to remember each of the loved ones that are no longer with us, these lit candles will then be moved to the reception. My son will walk me down the aisle and will also dance with me in place of my father.

November 15, 2006 at 12:17 pm
(6) Geba says:

My cousin’s father died before her wedding, so they remembered him by passing around a very large can of his favorite beer during the speeches…. I wanted to add this as a way -not- to remember your dad!

January 7, 2007 at 5:35 pm
(7) Ria says:

I set a table with a photograph of my decessed parents, a button holer & a corsage that would have been worn by them & two candles that were lit by my brother in law before I arrived and burned until the celebrations had finished, my son stepped in for his Grandfather by walking me down the aisle and making the “Father of the Bride” speech at the wedding breakfast. The following day I placed my top table arrangement on the grave along with a photo of myself and my new husband.

February 20, 2007 at 1:27 pm
(8) Shelby says:

My grandfather was like my father, he raised me. He passed away four years ago. In three weeks I’m getting married, I am honoring him by having his WWII flag (in the triangle case) displayed on the piano with a white candle. Very simple, very much papa!!!

March 15, 2007 at 9:07 pm
(9) Erika says:

Both of my parents are deceased, and for my upcoming wedding, I’ve decided to carry two flowers down the aisle (separate from my bouquet) and I’m going to place them in a vase at the altar, and we’ll have a note in the program that it’s in memory of them. Flowers are a nice, happy way to remember them, and it keeps the mood from shifting from joyeous to sad! Also at the reception, we’re going to have a memorial candle burning that I ordered online that has their names and “Parents of the Bride.” Again, it’s a simple way to keep their memory alive througout the ceremony and reception, but also maintains the upbeat mood of the day!

March 22, 2007 at 9:56 am
(10) Sarah says:

My father passed away and during the father daughter dance I will play a slideshow video of his pictures while the song “Dance with my Father Again” plays in the background.

April 3, 2007 at 10:49 pm
(11) Jen says:

My parents were not involved in my life and I was raised by my maternal grandparents. My grandfather died awhile back and I have no brothers, uncles, and basically no men left in my family. For my wedding coming up my grandmother is going to walk me down the isle and a chair with a white rose will be saved for grandfather. For the father-daughter dance I plan to do a swing dance with my father-in-law, as an uplifting, fun way to celebrate me getting a dad and not to make it such an emotional moment for our guests.

April 14, 2007 at 8:31 am
(12) Cyndy says:

My father will have passed away 3 1/2 months before my upcoming wedding in June. I know it will be far too emotional to make a spoken reference to his memory during the ceremony, so I have decided to carry his wedding ring in my bridal bouquet and will include a memorial note in the program to explain what it symbolizes.

May 15, 2007 at 2:12 pm
(13) Nancy T. says:

I officiated at a small wedding several years ago. Both of the groom’s parents had passed away within 6 months of the wedding. There were 2 chairs, in the front row on the groom’s side, that were left empty. He carried 2 roses up the aisle and placed them on the two chairs. Nothing was said, but everyone understood the significance.

May 26, 2007 at 10:20 pm
(14) Jenna says:

Im am getting married next September and want to incorporate all the loved ones from our passed. My mother passed away 2 years ago as did my grandmother and my fiances grandmother and now my grandfather has passed away as well. We are going to set up a special table with photos of all of those relatives and have a candle for each of them. At our reception we are going to have a moment of silence and Zac and I light the candles in memeory of those we wish could be there for this special day.

May 30, 2007 at 1:55 pm
(15) Heather says:

My father passed away 10 years ago. My fiance lost his mother several years ago as well. We are setting a table up with a vase for each of them. We had special silver charms made with their name and we will have a photograph of each of them. We are having a beach wedding and in the beginnig of the ceremony we will be placing a flower for each of them at the waters edge.

June 29, 2007 at 4:06 pm
(16) M.E.A. says:

I lost my father a few years before our marriage, and my mother and brother passed away just months before.

My brother was supposed to be a groomsman. Instead of my mother walking with me down the aisle, I walked her mother (my grandmother). I then returned to the back of the church and carried a single flower and set it where my mother would have sat. The bridesmaid who was to walk with my brother walked by herself, carrying a single flower. The groomsmen left my brothers spot open between them while they stood next to the altar.

At the reception, I danced with my mother’s sister for the mother-son dance.

July 13, 2007 at 6:01 pm
(17) Maria Foreman says:

My fiance and I both have lost someone very dear to us. My father died when is was 9 years old and his grandmother just died 2 years ago. At our wedding in October, we plan to light a candle in their memory along with our unity candle. This will be noted on our programs to let our guest know that we are honoring our loved ones.

July 31, 2007 at 12:02 pm
(18) Carole M. says:

Both of my daughters were married the same year. In their bouquets, they included 4 red roses to remember their grandparents (my parents) and great grand-parents who had passed.

August 4, 2007 at 4:00 pm
(19) Jason B. says:

We only have one parent and one step-parent between the two of us. We will have a special table set up at the reception with a photo album full of pictures of our late parents (as well as her living mother), many with us when we were younger. We are seating my sister, brother-in-law, and sister-in-law in the family pew where my parents would have been seated (my brother is my best man).

August 10, 2007 at 5:13 pm
(20) Gene says:

During the ceremony, mention the “people who can’t be with us today,” and as their names are mentioned have someone ring a small bell.

September 1, 2007 at 9:01 pm
(21) Kristen says:

My dad passed away eight years ago. Our best times together were when he was coaching my soccer team, so in honor of him, I will be wearing a pair of shinguards under my dress (yes, with heels!). My mom will walk me down the aisle, and my best friend of 23 years will be giving the “father of the bride” speech.

September 7, 2007 at 6:26 am
(22) Debra says:

place a single white rose on the chair to honor and remember the deceased

October 14, 2007 at 4:47 pm
(23) Monisha says:

my father-in-law passed away a couple of years before my husband and i’s wedding. we had already decided to ask for donations instead of setting up a gift registry; instead of picking a charity, we set up a charitable foundation in the name of my husband’s father (easy to do with tides foundation) and asked guests to donate to that. we picked organizations to support that my father-in-law would have supported and had him present in that way. we raised a lot of money and also quietly celebrated my husband’s father as the only parent who couldn’t be physically present.

October 18, 2007 at 10:46 am
(24) Niki says:

Have a place card that reads “In loving memory of…” and have it on the table with all the rest. This helped my cousin and her friends continue to heal as they mourned a recent loss.

November 5, 2007 at 10:33 pm
(25) Kimberly says:

I lost my dad almost 5 years ago. At our ceremony, I’m placing my parents engagement picture on a table and a candle that says “Daddy” on it. It’s appropriate to put the engagement picture because we are getting married on the groom’s parents 49th wedding anniversary.

January 11, 2008 at 4:13 pm
(26) Karen says:

I lost my Dad about 2 years ago. The priest who is marrying my fiance and I also performed my Dad’s funeral service. I bought the priest a vestment (what the priests wear) with a “In loving memory” tag embroidered on the inside. I know that it is there, so it will more personal to me. I am also having a photo of my Dad placed in my bouquet. My Mom is walking me down the aisle and dancing with my to the Father-Daughter dance. She has been my rock!

February 12, 2008 at 1:06 pm
(27) Erica says:

I am getting married in August ’08 and we are having a vase that is engraved with a memorial passage. The vase will be filled with red roses and one white rose for each lost loved one will be placed in the vase. We also have a passage in our program that explains the vase and includes each lost loved ones name.

February 15, 2008 at 12:57 pm
(28) Gigi says:

At each table there can be a pillar candle and a little card that says this candle burns in memeory of_________. Or a floral spray with a note card that reads this arrangement is dedicated to the memory of_____________. Both thoughtful and elegant.

March 6, 2008 at 2:01 pm
(29) Claudette says:

I’m helping someone who’s dad died 3 yrs ago and they were very close. I’m having her Mother and Dad’s Father walk her down the aisle as well all 3 light the unity candle together. She’s (and her Dad)also close to several uncles and they may walk behind them as well.

March 6, 2008 at 8:48 pm
(30) Lani says:

My fiance & I are lighting a 2-wick pillar candle in memory of his great-grandmother & my grandmother. They will also be mentioned in the wedding programs.

March 19, 2008 at 1:20 pm
(31) Benilde Domingues says:

A friend of mine just got married last week and his father died 8 months ago, because he missed his father so much I gave him the idea of having the ring Baer carry the wedding bands on top of his father’s most beloved bible, it was old and showed the well used pages. I decorated it with ribbons and 3 miniature roses, the one above the bow representing his father and the other 2 below the bow representing the bride and groom; it was beautiful and very sentimental

March 26, 2008 at 12:27 pm
(32) patty says:

My and my fiance’ fathers both passed away so instead of favors we are giving donations to charties that were related to them or how they passed away.
we are setting up 1 picture of him as achild with his dad and one of me as a child with my dad and in the middle of the 2 pictures we are having a frame with a typed explination of “in lieu of favors” we are giving donations in memory of our fathers.. came out really nice

April 8, 2008 at 7:08 pm
(33) Jackie says:

I will have my 2 older brothers walk me up the aisle. I am also in honor of my fiance’s mom donating to the american cancer society in lieu of favors. We are going to use a monogrammed piece of Hershey chocolate the small size and wrap a ribbon with a note letting everyone know that we donated in memory of Barb. I am using the hershey bars because they were my dad’s favorite.

April 13, 2008 at 4:36 pm
(34) Ashley says:

my Father passed away 3 years ago and both of my grandmothers when i was younger. my fiance’s grandparents have both passed away. and he lost his bestfriend of 20years. so we going to have a picture of each of our loved ones and a lit candle beside each picture.
also 1 of my brothers is giving me away and we are dancing together to the father daughter dance. We picked my wish by rascal flats to dance to.

April 27, 2008 at 9:14 pm
(35) VJHM says:

I lost my father, brother, and the groom lost his father also. For our wedding day I made a memorial candle with three wicks and with all three names on it. We had one of there children lite each wick on mememory of them. This moment was mention in the program and the pastor recognized the importants of our love ones. I acknowlege my dad with a picture of he and I (when I was on homecoming court) during my entrance I walked half alone (acknowledging his spirtual presence)and the remainder my brother walked me.

April 29, 2008 at 6:31 am
(36) Belinda says:

I just wanted to say how helpful this has all been to me. I am getting married in October 2008 & I lost my father just 5 months ago & am now starting to work on the order of service booklets & have been wondering how I can incorporate our loss without turning the mood of the ceremony to sadness. This has all been a great help.

April 29, 2008 at 5:20 pm
(37) Elaine says:

I am getting married soon and my uncle will walk me down the aisle.At the reception i am having a photograph of my father in a silver photo frame placed on the table next to the flowers

May 14, 2008 at 11:34 pm
(38) Dona says:

My fiance lost his father (and very best friend)in a motorcycle accident. They were both avid riders and how they spent a lot of their time together. I am having a flower placed in all bouquets and boutioneers in the bridal party the same color as his bike. Also my fiances mother and brother will have one. Between the ceremony and reception, we are riding to the cemetary and placing a cross covered in his colored flowers on his grave. The significance of the flowers will be in the program, but the trip to the cemetary will be ours alone.

May 20, 2008 at 1:01 am
(39) Diane says:

My grandparents have all passed on and my fiance lost his grandmothers, his last surviving grandparents, shortly before our wedding. One grandmother passed two months before our wedding, the other 23 days before. [The latter was buried with her coursage since it had been finished prior to her death.] We will have a vase with eight single carnations, surrounded by their pictures, at our wedding and reception. After the reception, the flowers will be taken to the cemetaries and placed on each of the graves.

May 23, 2008 at 6:39 pm
(40) Megan says:

My aunt was in charge of my bridal shower, and was really excited about my wedding. She had no children of her own, so she helped with the nieces and nephews. I am getting married in a week, and last weekend she suddenly took a turn for the worse and lost her fight with liver cancer. I am putting a candle near a picture of her, my uncle who passed away when I was five, and their parents(my great grandparents) at the wedding.

June 5, 2008 at 6:31 pm
(41) Kim says:

My fiance and I are getting married next summer and both of us have lost our fathers (his 10 years ago, mine a year ago). I was very much a “Daddy’s girl” so want to honor him in our wedding, however, I want to do so without it becoming too sad or emotional.

Here are a couple of ideas that we have come up with:
Rather than having 1 male walk me down the isle (which will feel like I am just replacing him), I am having 2 of my brothers walk me down.

After they walk down the isle (before the wedding party does), both of our mothers will like a candle on the alter for each of our dads.

We are having both of our father’s wedding bands melted down and having our bands made out of them. There will be mention of this by the pastor before we exchange the rings.

June 5, 2008 at 6:34 pm
(42) Kim says:

I forgot one other thing in my previous post. Rather than give favors (which often people end up leaving behind or throwing away), we are having donations made to charities that pertain causes important to our fathers. On the back of each place card we will have a statement “In honor of our family and friends and in memory of our fathers donations have been made to the American Lung Association and the American Diabetes Association”.

June 6, 2008 at 9:43 am
(43) Kim says:

My son is getting married this month. Both the Bride and Groom have special people that have passed away that they want to honor during their ceremony. Two tables will be set up on either side of the bride and groom, each one with pictures and candles of their respective family members, and a candle for each. Right before the unity candle is lit, the pastor will explain that they will now light the memory candles in honor of (insert the names, titles of each person) and ask for a moment of silence while the candles are lit (there will be silence anyway, but we opted for this instead of a song during this that would be too emotional for some), then each will take the candle that was lit by their mothers and first go to the tables to light the candles, and as they turn to reunite at the unity candle, the song they chose for the unity candle lighting will start playing softly and then they will light that one with the same candles. A quiet but obvious way to honor. At my nephew’s wedding 2 years ago, they used a slideshow showing pictures of the groom with his Pa Pa and very touching music, we opted not to do this because it was way too emotional for the family of the deceased and some were even offended because they weren’t expecting it and the mood was dampened greatly. Please think that through when thinking of something like that.

June 6, 2008 at 7:31 pm
(44) Janine says:

My brother is having my son Zachary who was still born as an honorary usher at his wedding.
He will have a table set up at the reception with a picture in a frame of his hands, a candle that I had made the pregnancy and infant loss ribbon, and the teddy bear that I had made with angel wings wearing a tuxedo sitting on the table near the head table. (The bear is in all of our family pictures)

June 7, 2008 at 6:07 pm
(45) Melyssa says:

My mother passed away 4 years ago from ovarian cancer. I haven’t seen most of the family that will be at our wedding since her funeral. I struggled with the best way to remember her without being too sad. We decided that the best way to honor her would be to have donations made to a Foundation that could help other women be at their daughter’s weddings. So, our wedding favors will be a small card that says: Thank you for sharing this day with us. In celebration of hope, love, and new beginnings, we have made a contribution in your name to the Ovarian Cancer Research Fund, in memory of my mom’s name.”

June 9, 2008 at 11:11 am
(46) Maryellen says:

Like many suggestions above, two candles will be lit to honor the people who have left this world, specifically my grandfather, 2 of my aunts, and his grandparents. My fiance is a military man and we will have 5 close friends (including my favorite uncle) all serving in Iraq at the time of our wedding next month. To honor them, we will have 5 yellow roses each in its’ own vase, surrounding our wedding cake. A tag will be attached to each vase with their name on it.

June 9, 2008 at 11:25 am
(47) Maryellen says:

OK, to clarify the above. There are two candles, one for my intentions of those that won’t be there and one for him. To honor my grandfather, who was the world to me, one of his hankies will wrap around the stems of my bouquet. Of course my grandfather didn’t use beautiful white hankies, he used those red – western-looking hankerchiefs, so a bit of lace will complete the look.

June 10, 2008 at 2:37 pm
(48) Stefanie says:

I lost my father two weeks before he was going to walk me down the isle. I am going to carry by rose bouqet off all red roses and one white rose in the middle. My mother is going to walk me down the isle and when we get to the front there will be a pillard with a picture of he and I. I will then walk over and pull the white rose out and put it beside his picture. Then my mother will take my hand and give me away.

June 16, 2008 at 4:57 pm
(49) crystal says:

I lost both of my Parents and im going to leave rose at each seat in memory of the loved ones that passed away.

June 21, 2008 at 7:26 pm
(50) Emma says:

My father in law and all our grandparents could not be at our wedding so we had a table with candles incorporated into a folwer arrangenemt. We bought candles in our colour theme and has everyones names engraved onto them and they sat in a bed of flowers on a table by themselves with a little plaque saying “Always with us in spirit on our special day”

July 6, 2008 at 8:50 pm
(51) Peggy says:

For my daughter’s wedding,when the flower girl walks down the isle she will give a rose to the mothers of the bride and groom in memorial of the deseased grandparents.

July 11, 2008 at 10:59 am
(52) heather says:

My mother passed away a couple of years before my wedding, to honor her at the ceremony we had baskets of pixies with pins at the doors when people came into the church. We asked that all people wore the little flowers in rememberance of my mother and those whom we unable to attend the wedding.

July 14, 2008 at 2:59 pm
(53) Meg says:

My daughter had a heart-shaped pocket sewn to the inside of her wedding dress near her heart where she put her father’s wedding ring so that in some way he was still walking her down the aisle on her very special day.

July 15, 2008 at 7:14 am
(54) Anitra says:

My mother passed away 8 years ago. My wedding is on Valentine’s Day and I am planning on wearing a hear shaped locket with her picture inside. My mother also loved the singer Sade, so my fiance and I are going to dance to one of her songs for our first dance.

July 15, 2008 at 11:43 pm
(55) Marianne says:

My fiance’s father died when my fiance was only 5, and of course he still misses him. My mother passed 6 years ago. I came up with a different idea to remember our parents, which will not be included in the ceremony, but instead at the reception.

There will be a small table with a picture of each parent that had passed. I’d like to add a nice verse as well. Also, I thought it would be nice to display something that reminds each of us of the parent that had passed.

For my mother it’s a 1964 Betty Crocker cookbook – just like the one my mother and I would use together when I learned to cook and through my years growing up.

For my fiance, he smiles when he talks of his father bringing home a 1964 Mustang pedal car. I can’t exactly put a pedal car on a table (plus it costs quite a bit). So I did find a miniature replica that Hallmark made in ’96. I’m going to repaint it the same blue that my fiance’s pedal car was.

This will be a surprise to him because he doesn’t know I’ve been working on this idea. I mentioned it months ago and he liked the idea, but when he saw the cost of a replica (over $200), he decided we’d better not do it.

July 16, 2008 at 2:02 pm
(56) Mark says:

We are going to honor our relatives that have passed by having our children release balloons during the ceremony.

July 18, 2008 at 9:21 pm
(57) Rev Danny says:

I have a flower table for ceremoonies that is used for candle, sand or rose ceremonies. One wedding a pottery vase the grooms’ deceased father had made was displyed on the lower shelf so that he was “there” in the middle of the whole event. I read a passage of scripture from the father’s funeral during the candle lighting as well.

July 18, 2008 at 10:12 pm
(58) Leslie says:

I’m going to honor my mother, she died about 10 years ago of lung cancer at age 47 I’m getting a special flower arrangement made of my favorite flowers and hers to sit up front at my wedding and after the big event is over me,and my husband will go to the cemetary and lay them on her special spot,I also may take the charm idea that was a really good idea.

July 20, 2008 at 10:48 am
(59) melissa says:

My father and grandmother passed away, and my fiance’s maternal grandfather and paternal grandparents are deceased, as well. We are having silk flower arrangements made for the church that will have a plaques on them with our loved ones’ names. They are a donation to the church, and I will get to see them each time I go to church. (Tips 1) speak to the pastor first to see if it is something they could use — they can be placed later in any room of the church 2) get neutral colors that won’t clash with your color scheme or the church’s 3)if you do not have ties to the church, your family members can take them home to remember them

July 21, 2008 at 8:28 pm
(60) Marlise says:

I am getting married on the 16th of August and it will be two years that mother passed away. To remember her my husband to be and I are lighting a candle and the beginning of the ceremony and because the role of my Matron of honor is in memory of my mom my bridesmaids will have a small photo of her on their bouquets. There are other suttle things around that no one will know except the people that I have told:)

July 25, 2008 at 11:18 pm
(61) Alice says:

Hello! I have found this link to be the best of help! For the longest, I wasn’t sure how I wanted to honor my mother who passed away four years. I dreaded the moment of saying something or making anyone else sad since its suppose to be a joyous occasion. Now I feel better knowning i’m definitely not alone. I decided that at my wedding on Nov. 29th 2008. I will do a few things: my mother gave me her wedding band when she passed away and I am having it fixed up a bit to wear on my wedding day, I have also compiled a few clips of her dancing at different parties since she loved dancing. At the end of our toast, my brother who is the bestman is going to add a little something by asking for a moment of silence while my nephews light up a few candles. We are going to invite all our guests to join us in dancing all of my mom’s favorite songs, while the clips are playing and she is dancing and laughing at these different parties. I think this is the best way to have her be part of my wedding to see her smile and laughing the night away. Hopefully it will take the sadness away after remembering her. Anyhow, I look forward to the moment! Hope this helps anyone else!

July 27, 2008 at 6:46 am
(62) Chantal says:

I am getting married in 12 wks and my partner and i lost our second son to SIDS. I am going to be carrying rosary beads with a keyring photo of him on them instead of a bouquet.

August 5, 2008 at 10:30 am
(63) Jodi says:

I’m getting married in Oct. and we lost my dad almost 2 yrs ago. I’m going to have a small table or pilar to the right of the ceramony site with a candle burning in hurricane holder (as it’s outside) and have a note in the program that the candle burns in memory of him.

September 2, 2008 at 8:07 pm
(64) Laura says:

My fiance’s mother passed away two years ago. She loved butterflies and we released them at her memorial service. We have deided to release them towards the beginning of the ceremony and make mention of the significance in our programs.

September 4, 2008 at 2:34 pm
(65) Ashley says:

i’m getting married this coming spring. My fater passed away 10 years ago and its still hard for me. So, during the wedding i’m going to honor him with a flower that i will have in my bouquet. I’m going to place it on the table with the unity candle.

September 16, 2008 at 1:08 am
(66) Megan says:

My younger sister, Jennifer, passed away about a year ago. As far back as I can remember, my sisters were always supposed to be my Maids of Honor. Missing her is the hardest thing we’ve had to deal with in planning our wedding. My youngest sister, Stephanie, (there were three of us) of course will be my Maid of Honor, but it seemed like something, or someone, was missing. I decided to ask Jennifer’s best friend since childhood to stand in her place. HE was, appropriately, honored. Jeremy has always been like our brother, and I can’t imagine a better way to include Jenni in our wedding, after all.

September 16, 2008 at 1:23 pm
(67) Veronica and Donald Dec. 2008 says:

During our ceremony we will have two 72″ colums with white calla lillies in a clear vase on top. After the vows, and lightin of the unity candle, I will present his mother with one vase and he will present my mother with the other in honor of our deceased fathers.

October 3, 2008 at 1:57 pm
(68) Kerri says:

My grandfather passed 5 months before the wedding,and he was going to be giving me away. I asked my uncle, his son, to give me away in his father’s place, and to state that he was doing it on behalf of his father who could not be there. Also, my best girlfriend made my bouquet and surprised me by attaching his WW2 POW medal to my bouquet stem! It was very touching.

November 12, 2008 at 6:34 pm
(69) Erin says:

My father passed away on Septmeber 3rd of Cancer and on September 2 my Fiance’ and I had a Ceremony in his hospital room. We had a family friend take pictures. It was very special to have my father give me away. My wedding was scheduled for September 20th and my father insisted we “go on with the show.” I had my uncle walk me down and when it was time to give me away we had the congregation seated and I had 10 of my Dad’s closest friends along with my mom stand and say together “we do” in honor of his memory when the pastor asked who gives their love and support to this couple in marriage. We also had a candle on the alter for my dad with a beautiful single flower. It was a subtle but beautiful way of honoring him since he could not be with us.

November 13, 2008 at 12:26 pm
(70) Melissa says:

for my brother’s wedding, I created a memorial candle in a hurricane vase which was tied with ribbons that had the names of deceased relatives of both bride and groom (i.e. Mary Smith, Mother of the Bride). This candle was processed down the aisle by the bride’s godmother during the ceremony where the MOB would have walked. Candle was placed on the altar and was set on a table at the reception.

December 8, 2008 at 8:14 pm
(71) Phyllis says:

My groom’s mother died 6 months before our wedding. We placed a single lit candle on the alter with a note in the program “The single lighted candle on the alter is in loving honor of John’s mother Jane Smith.”

December 9, 2008 at 4:13 am
(72) Dawn says:

My fiance and I have both lost a parent. His Dad and my Mom. We will have a table with a memorial candle set up on each side of the alter for each of the deceased. To mark the beginning of the ceremony, he and his Mother will walk down the isle to his Dads table and light his memorial candle together, he escorts her to her seat and takes his place at the alter. Followed by the matron and bridesmaids and of course, my Father and me. Before joining the groom at the alter, my Dad and I will walk over and light my Moms candle. For the lighting of the unity candle, my daughter and son will walk down and light my candle off my moms and his two daughters will walk down and light his candle off his dads. Our children will remain standing (at the unity candle) as we walk over and light the unity candle. This way we incorperate the family unit. Plus include our deceased parents into the beginning of our new life together.

December 9, 2008 at 11:46 pm
(73) shayla says:

I’m getting married next year and I lost both of my parents almost 5 years ago. To honor them at my wedding I will wear a diamond tennis bracelet that my mom gave me, my older brother will step in as my father walking me down the aisle, and at my reception we will have a small table set up with two candles burning and place cards with their names and a picture of them together and the day after the wedding my soon to be husband and I will take our two sons out to the cemetary and take pictures by their headstones and add it to our wedding album.

January 27, 2009 at 10:33 pm
(74) Annie says:

This has helped me so much, but I am a whimp so maybe my comment can help another like me. I just lost my father in Oct 08 and my oldest brother 13 months prior to dad. I still have a hard time even looking through old photos of them. I have came to the conclusion that I cannot walk down that isle and see their photos on the altar. I will break down without a doubt!! I have decided to honor them in a different way… I am “celebrating” their memory! What I have decided is that we will have a “toast” at the beginning of the reception. I will have a Memorial Table set up with beautiful framed pictures, 2 candles in hurricane glasses lit in their honor, 2 shot glasses for the toast(lol) and 2 yellow roses. This way I can visit the table throughout the evening in a more happy atmosphere and it’s not so hard for me and my family (for that matter) to handle. Hope this helps!! :)

February 3, 2009 at 1:12 pm
(75) Angela says:

Both my grandparents and my fiance’s grandparents are deceased so at our wedding my mother and future mother-in-law will light candles in memory of them which will be on a table at the front of the church with photographs of them.

February 11, 2009 at 11:35 am
(76) Valerie says:

My grandmother passed away on December 15,2008. At the age of 94. Her name was Pearl. Valerie is asking all women to bring and unwanted string of Pearls to the reception, to be placed in a vase,and there will be a special dedication (dance). in memory of her grandmother.

February 16, 2009 at 9:57 pm
(77) Christy says:

My dad died several years ago. My sister is getting married May 2009. The pastor is going to read the wedding ceremony from my father’s ceremony book that he himself used as a pastor. There will be a special mention of it in the wedding program.

February 17, 2009 at 11:43 pm
(78) lynette says:

I have been looking for a website like this and am so thankful I’ve found it! July will be 13 years since I lost my father and it’s been 4 years since I lost my mother. I miss them terribly and want to do something in their memory as does my fiance. I am thinking that we are going to have 3 white roses and 2 red roses. The white symbolize his grandmother and great grandmother as well as my best friend. The red roses will symbolize my mother and father. We will light a candle and I have been thinking about lighting it at the same time as we do the unity. I would have liked to play a song or have someone read the poem but I think that would make me miss them even more than I already will and I want to be happy and be thankful they are with me in spirit….not be sad that they aren’t there in person (if that makes sense). So anyway, thanks for all of the great posts!

March 7, 2009 at 12:33 pm
(79) Cork says:

Have a composite photographer or digital artist add the departed loved one to one or more of the wedding photographs. Perhaps a photo of the bride walking down the aisle with dad next to her. This can be done to make it look just like he was there or in a way which shows him more ethereal like a spirit. There can also be a portrait with the bride kissing her departed loved one in a special location at the wedding or at the reception.

March 12, 2009 at 9:40 am
(80) Seren says:

My father passed away six months before I got engaged. To encorporate him in the wedding, I plan to carry a lit candle (very carefully) in my bouquet as I walk down the aisle. At the alter, I will give the candle to my Maid of Honor (my sister) who can put it on a small table next to his picture. I also hope to incorporate my late maternal grandparents in some fashion.

March 28, 2009 at 1:27 pm
(81) Lynn Ross says:

At my daughter and son-in-law’s wedding….we asked a family member to go up and (1) light a ‘special’ candle on the alter to acknowledge our deceased loved ones, (2) followed by saying the verse below. (3) The names of the deceased, then, followed the verse.

“Although we cannot see you
We know that you are here
Smiling down, watching over us
As we say “I DO”
Forever in our hearts
Forever in our lives
And so we say our vows in
In loving memory of you
This light shines
as a symbol of life
and love remembered.”

May 3, 2009 at 10:13 am
(82) Lisa says:

I plan to honor my new husbands parents (who are both deceased) by leaving his side, front row empty with a single rose placed on the seat with a card with their name, year of birth and year of death. It’s been a while since they have passed, but my fiance still misses them. I never had the pleasure of meeting them – and I know how much he wishes they could have been there.

May 19, 2009 at 4:42 pm
(83) Ashley says:

My Fiance’s mother past away April 27th, 2009 and our wedding is October 17th, 2009. we are trying to figure out something special to do. I really dont think he has even thought about this or he has and not said anything about it, but what do u think we should do about the Groom/Mother dance? I have talked to my Aunt about this and she thinks we should just skip the whole Bride/Father dance and the Groon/Mother dance and just do the 1st dance for us. What do you all think about that?

May 30, 2009 at 7:16 pm
(84) Anna Grupe says:

My Brother lost his wife & youngest Daughter in a car accident 8.5 months prior to his middle daughter getting married. This was a very emotional time for all of us. The Bride, my niece asked me to help honor them so I had a small table set up next to the wedding party with candles & long stem white roses. Each rose was tied w/ the Step- Mother & sisters favorite colors. As the Pastor read a passage that I wrote ecspecially for the deceased, the Bride & Groom proceeded to light the candles in honor of the Brides Step-Mother & younger sister and then The Bride & Groom presented the White Long Stem Roses, one w/ a pink ribbon for the sister and yellow ribbon for the step-mother to the Brides Father as we played Forever in Love by Kenny G. Needless to say there were alot of tears, but the ceremony was absolutely beutiful.

June 3, 2009 at 6:05 am
(85) Casey says:

I will be getting married on June 17

June 3, 2009 at 6:09 am
(86) Casey says:

I will be getting married June 17, 2009, and I have two people I will be honoring. My grandfather, and a very close friend, whom I considered family. My bouquet will be white roses, with two red roses in the center, which will symbolize these two very important people in my life… It’s a subtle way to remember them, while still having a wonderful day!!

June 6, 2009 at 2:37 pm
(87) karen Walker says:

My daughter will be getting married soon and I’m hand sewing her a special hankie made with lace around the edge from my wedding dress cape. Her father died a few years ago and I am going to sew a small swatch of his clothing into the hem of the hankie just so she knows he is there in spirit with her. I will make her a photo charm for her bouqet too. I will also carry a lily down the isle at my daughters request in memory of him.

June 14, 2009 at 3:18 pm
(88) Darla says:

My fiancee’s mother passed away before we met. I also have lost 2 aunts that I was very close with. Instead of the flower girls carrying baskets they will carry down a memorial garland in memory of these individuals to be placed on the altar. We will acknowledge this gesture in our programs.

June 17, 2009 at 10:19 am
(89) Tasha says:

Ive had a number of very close people pass away & wanted to honor them all (5) one of them being my dad. I decided to buy heart shape picture frames (1/2”) and dangle them from my bouquet with some nice ribbon.
I ended up with 3 hearts. 1 heart for my dad. 1 heart for 2 friends. 1 heart for 2 grandparents. If measured right they cascade below the brides hands and look very nice. At the reception (i didnt throw the bouquet) i laid my bouquet out so that others could view it.
If you wanted to throw yours the frames can be easily taken off & made to hang from something else at the reception.

June 23, 2009 at 12:46 am
(90) Tina says:

During one of the readings at my brother’s wedding names were listed of lost family members and there was audible sobbing. For my wedding I’m opting for a moment of silence during the ceremony (without saying names) and will have a candle for my grandmother and my fiance’s father at the reception. While I would like to have candles for everyone, I don’t want to burn down the reception hall either! :)

July 1, 2009 at 1:23 am
(91) Sara says:

We are getting married December 11, 2009 on the beach in the Mayan Riviera. Both our grandfathers passed away as a result of heart attacks. In lieu of wedding favours, we are going to make a monetary donation on behalf of each guest to the Heart & Stroke Foundation in their memory, and then create cards for each place setting explaining so, with a nice poem.

July 6, 2009 at 1:47 am
(92) miranda says:

my husband and i were just married in march and his mom had passed away as well as my father. so when it came to making the invitations, we didnt know what to do…so we decided to list our three daughters as the inviting party. then my father in law walked me down the isle because i couldnt do it by myself. but we left out the who gives away the bride bit. lastly we decaded our marriage and our ceremony to the memory of my father and his mother.

July 12, 2009 at 12:16 am
(93) kari says:

I am getting married July 18th and my dad past away 2 years ago–it will be very tough–my mom is walking me down the aisle to Butterfly kisses and then the ring bearer is walking down with the rings in 1 of his old cars. My sweetie and i get to drive in a 55 bel aire that day his 1st car–then for the tribute fater daughter dance–dancing with my sweet nephews to my song with my dad butterfly kisses– it will be a hard day but very special

July 17, 2009 at 2:38 pm
(94) Sam says:

my future mother-in-law and father-in-law have both passed away, so were leaving a vase of flowers on the first two seats on the groom’s side. and at the reception we’re bringing the flowers, along with a poem I found, and a picture of my in-laws. (and there’s a little part of our ceremony that acknowledges Mom and Dad.

July 25, 2009 at 1:09 am
(95) Anonymous says:

At my engagement party, I dedicated a song that my father used to love when I was younger and he used to sing to.
Well I personally think, no matter what one does on their special day, its filled with all kinds of emotions. My mother and I held each other while we both cried like a babies (it was only 6months since his death). I still think it was a nice touch even though we cried but its always a tough time. After that we all whiped away our tears and danced the night away just the way he used to love dancing.
I also didn’t do the father daughter dance because since he wasn’t there, it wouldn’t feel or be the same. I’ll always remember our last dance and on my wedding day, I think I will place that photo of us with a lovely poem about my angel.

July 27, 2009 at 4:47 pm
(96) Stina says:

I was so happy to come across this link. I lost my father when I was 16 and my mom is suffering from severe Alzheimers. I have decided to write a little note in which I honor my parents and leave one on each plate at the reception. I will also attach my father’s wedding band to my bouquet.

August 11, 2009 at 4:45 pm
(97) THERESE says:

ME AND MY FIANCE BOUGTH TWO MEMORIAL CANDLES ON PLAQUES
ONE FOR EACH OF HIS PARENTS BOTH ARE DECEASED AND AT THE BEGINNING OF THE WEDDING MY DAUGHTER IS READING A POEM IN SPANISH WHILE WHILE HIOUR NIECE ON HIS SIDE IS READING IT IN ENGLISH THE WE ARE PLAYING YOU RAISE ME UP BY JOSH GROBAN WHILE HE AND I WILL LIGHT THE CANDLES. WE WANT THEM TO BE APART OF OUR BIG DAY THANK YOU THERESE

August 13, 2009 at 8:28 pm
(98) Lennie says:

My daughter is getting married July 24, 2010. Her father died in 2002. Hanging from her bouquet will be a locket with her dad’s picture in it. That way, he is with her as she walks down the aisle with her stepdad. She will dance the father-daughter dance with her stepdad. And we will have a candle and something in the program for her dad and the groom’s grandparents

August 18, 2009 at 12:07 am
(99) Elissa says:

My Fiance’s mother passed away before he and I even knew each other, so I was never able to meet her formerly. Although as a weird twist of fate, I vaguely remember crossing paths with her not long before her death. Out of respect for her we’ve put both sets of parents names on our invitations and included her in them. She will also be mentioned in speeches that are to be had on the evening with similar wording to “it would have been nice for (his mothers name) to have met you as I believe she would have…” and hopefully something nice regarding what our relationship may have been like will follow.

August 19, 2009 at 8:53 pm
(100) Becky says:

My mom just died in a car accident one month ago, my wedding is in one week. We decided to keep going with our plan because that what is she would have wanted. We are honoring her by using hydrangeas and sweet peas, two of her favorites, in our centerpieces and bouquets. We are also lighting a candle in her honor that will burn by the guestbook all night. I have also glued a tiny picture of her on the back of each table number ( this way she is present with all of us at each table).
I think any subtle way to honor those you love who are not here to celebrate your day is so wonderful.

August 25, 2009 at 7:45 pm
(101) simone says:

my fiance’s father passed away vey suddenly when i was 3 months pregnant nearly 6 years ago, i am a very centamentle person and i wanted to do a candle ceremony in our wedding with his two sisters to lite it but he thought it was a little too sad for him and his family so i found a nother poem for the celebrant to read at the beginning of our ceremony. we are having the ceremony where my great grandfather had a house and we now have a family tree planted there wityh all who have passed on scattered under it, it feels like you are in a garden and you would not know there was a house there ever so i am also framing a picture of the house on a easle and getting all invited to sighn around it for us to keep, so you will see the poem i chose goes really well for all because it goes for both sides now instead of just the one person

loved ones
“Although we are separated physically, faith and love have bound us eternally.
Though we cannot see them, we know they are here.
Though we cannot touch them, we feel the warmth of their smile, as we begin a new chapter in our lives.
we know that they’ll be happy to see our wedding day. they know that we have found tru love and we will be okay.
Today we pause to reflect upon those who have shaped our character,
Molded our spirits and touched our hearts. A representation of the everlasting impact they have made upon our lives.”

September 2, 2009 at 5:28 pm
(102) BB says:

My fiance’s mother passed away 6 years ago. Also our grandfathers on both sides of our family, and his paternal grandmother have passed. His father is going to be his best man and his brother a groomsmen, and we are going to use his moms favorite flower as their boutennires, and also his living grandmother’s(his moms mother) corsage she will wear will be made up of the same flower. We will also leave the seat empty where his mom would be sitting and he will place a rose on it before he takes his place at the altar. Also our unity candle will have all of their names engraved on it.

September 4, 2009 at 3:11 pm
(103) Kim says:

My Nana passed away less than a year ago and my fiance’s Grampas passed several years ago. Both are very significant in our lives, so we plan to have photographs of them displayed with a coursage and boutonniere which will be taken to the cemetry the next day. Also my Reverend will mention their names in the blessing.

September 5, 2009 at 12:21 am
(104) Andrea says:

My fiancee and I have both lost a fair number of grandparents and aunts and uncles. We are decorating the alter at the church we are being married at by having a vase of flowers for each relative and then mentioning it on the back of the program.

January 22, 2010 at 10:43 pm
(105) Nadine says:

My fiance’s father passed away 5yrs age we are getting married in Feb 2010, he was a wonderful man so in memory of him we will place a special quote in the ceremony program under father of the groom. Two candles will be lit on the signing table in memory of deceased father and also my fiance’s nan. For the reception we will have table set up with candles and photos of two deceased with the same quote xox

February 2, 2010 at 5:04 pm
(106) jessica says:

i just recently lost my dad in may of 2009! now here it is feb 2nd and im getting married in 38 days. its going to be tough not having him there, he truly had a light, that drew people to him, he loved life and family, and i miss him more and more each day. thank you all so much for your very helpful ideas and suggestions i really appreciate it!

February 20, 2010 at 2:13 am
(107) Felicia says:

My husband passed away couple of years ago, and now my son will be getting married in few months’time. I have been thinking of ways that we could include him in the ceremony.
A big thank you to the various tips from this site.
Together with my son and daughter, we will be lighting a candle to my husband’s memory at the start of the service, and a single candle litted on each table at the reception.

March 2, 2010 at 9:11 am
(108) Rose says:

I just came across this site by accident. I shed several tears while reading everyone’s entries. I am about to have my second wedding next yr. My father gave me away at my first wedding, as every father should. Unfortunately, I foolishly married an abusive man. This time, I am doing things right and marrying someone who truely loves and respects me. This time, my father can not give me away. He died two yrs ago from a heart attack. It has torn mine apart, the thought of him not being there to share this happy day. Thanks to all of you, I have several ideas on how to still have my father with me. Best wishes to you all.

March 2, 2010 at 11:17 am
(109) Jeannie says:

Both our dads have passed. During the ceremony there will be empty chairs with their pictures beside our mothers. At the beginning of the ceremony, 2 young grandchildren will present white roses to our mothers and place red roses in the empty chairs. I will keep my father close to me during the service by using his monogramed handerkerchief as the wrap to my bouquet, secured with his diamond service award pin. My son will walk me down the aisle.

March 16, 2010 at 3:56 pm
(110) Saraha says:

My father passed away when i was 9 years old. I am getting married May 1, 2010. When i went to order my invitations they told me that i could not put my dad on the invations which really upset me. I know that it is not proper to put a deceased person on a invitation but i feel as if they are not paying for it my family is so i should be able to put whoever i would like on there. So that is what i did. I love you Dad!!!

March 21, 2010 at 4:12 pm
(111) Kristy says:

I am getting married in June and I have lost my mother and my fiancée has lost his brother so I am getting memory vases for them and then doing a photo collage for the grandparents and uncles who have passed.

May 31, 2010 at 11:07 pm
(112) SHIV says:

Would like to hear how best to write the invitation for my daughter-in-law to be whose father is deceased.
“Bride’s name
“daughter of (mother’s name) and Late (father’s name)”
or any other advice.
Thx

June 17, 2010 at 12:54 pm
(113) Jason says:

My father and sister have both passed away within the last 2 years. We’ll have a picture of each set up at the reception, with a single carnation for dad, and a sunflower for my sister. I’m also going to put wallet sized photos of them in my tux’s breast pocket, to remind me that even though they aren’t with us anymore, they live on in my heart.

June 20, 2010 at 8:50 pm
(114) 1 week says:

It’s one week until my wedding, and my finance and I have been struggling with how to keep his father included in out special day. He passed away a month ago, we are still dealing with the grief and don’t feel ready to celebrate. It has been nice to read your posts and know that we are not alone. We are having a vase made with the names of all of those who cannot be there engraved on it, the vase will be at the front of the church and brought to the reception. I will also include the lovely poem posted earlier. The vase will then be kept in our home and on the birthdays of our loved ones we can fill it with flowers to celebrate their lives. Thank you for your help.

July 30, 2010 at 3:09 pm
(115) Rachael says:

My father passed several years ago, so my stepfather will walk me down the aisle. To honor my father, my son will do a spiritual dance for the father/daughter dance. I will also have a candle with a poem on it light for him.

September 2, 2010 at 9:25 pm
(116) RUTH says:

I CAME ACROSS THIS SITE LOOKING FOR WAYS TO HONOR THOSE CLASSMATES WHO HAVE PASSED & WE ARE DOING IT NOT ONLY WITH A MEMORY BOARD BUT ALSO WITH SOMETHING ON THE TABLES…I WANTED TO HAVE MORE REMEMBRANCES OF OUR CLASSMATES & IT WAS SUGGESTED HAIVING SOMETHING ON THE TABLES ALSO FOR PEOPLE TO SEE BETTER. SOME OF YOUR THOUGHTS HAVE TOUCHED MY HEART & BLESSINGS TO ALL OF YOU WHO WILL HONOR YOUR LOVED ONES ON YOUR VERY SPECIAL DAY!! AND!! IF ONE WANTS TO PUT THEIR DECEASED PARENTS NAME ON THE INVITATIONS…GO FOR IT!! YOU ALL ARE VERY SPECIAL & MAY ALL OF YOU HAVE MUCH LOVE & HAPPINESS IN YOUR LIVES AS YOU WALK DOWN THIS ROAD OF LIFE!!

September 11, 2010 at 1:05 pm
(117) Jenna says:

My future husband’s mother passed away very suddenly nearly 3 years ago and we were very close. I have borrowed her engagement ring and wedding band and will be tying them into my bouquet with a blue ribbon when we marry in 3 weeks. It will be a nice way to have her close to us on our wedding day.

September 26, 2010 at 6:51 pm
(118) tanya says:

My friend gets married next year and she lost
her brother a couple of years ago, I know she
would have had him as a big part in her day
so I’m going to try and find a jigsaw piece locket
That she can fassen to her flowers on the day
As the missing piece then give her a braclet
as a gift to keep it on after, I hope she will love it x

October 11, 2010 at 1:58 am
(119) Sheena says:

My father passed away 6 months before my wedding. I have a stepfather and three older brothers so instead pf being forced to choose, I walked alone down the asile. My three brothers stood in the ceremony when the pastor asked “who gives this woman to be married” and as did my mother.
At the reception, instead of dancing to what would have been the father daughter dance I danced with all three older brothers. I chose Elton John’s Can you feel the love tonight. Elton John was my dads favorite singer and he used to sing that song to me when I was a little girl.

February 8, 2011 at 6:13 am
(120) Lana says:

Im getting married in a month and I have been putting alot of thought into how to honour my mother who died suddenly 2 months ago. I is still very raw for me and although it will be hard I want to do something special in her memory.More than anyone, my mum wanted to see me get married. I have been teary reading some of these beautiful ideas, thank you.

February 9, 2011 at 11:38 pm
(121) Heather says:

I’m in the Navy and my grandmother died 4 days after I left. I found out around 3 weeks in through a letter from my mom which had the program from her mother’s funeral. Because of the pictures included in it, I had to open the letter in front of my Chief and I couldn’t hold anything in when I saw the program. My grandmother was a strong woman and was a huge part of how I became the woman I am today. Same goes for both of my dad’s parents. I love and miss them sooooo much and think everyday that I plan my wedding that I wish they could all be there. These ideas are amazing and would love to use one of them for my wedding. Thank you!

February 26, 2011 at 1:40 pm
(122) Keri O'Hara says:

I love to help brides, and grooms, keep their loved ones who have passed, close to their heart on their special day. I make custom memorial photo charms to dangle from a brides bouquet, or hang from a boutonniere pin. I also create custom text sides for writing in place of a second image. Please view my collection here to see if I can create one for you. http://www.etsy.com/shop/DelaneyJewelry?section_id=6806431

March 7, 2011 at 6:21 pm
(123) Cynthia Gregory says:

When my nephew married, my sister made up special boutonnieres for her deceased husbands family to wear the included a small locket size photo in a little silver frame attached. They were touched to bring his presence to his son’s wedding.

March 31, 2011 at 8:57 am
(124) Heidi says:

My father died when I was 14 and we were very close. When I was little he would often bring me carnations. So, for our wedding we are handing out red carnations for everyone to hold during the ceremony in remembrance of him. After there will be vases to put them in and they will come to the reception with us.

April 20, 2011 at 6:12 am
(125) julie says:

hi im getting married july this year my dad passed away and also my parntners parents have passed away and i have a aunt and uncle who passedaway their chridren will be at the weddding my (cousions) so to rember them we are going to set ballons of after the service so then it wont upset anyone then the day wont be sad we are just going to write their names on them and put a saying on a tag and let them go so all the people and i have rembered our loved ones who are not their in a specail way

April 21, 2011 at 7:00 pm
(126) amanda says:

Both my mother and my fiance’s mother have passed away and in honor of them, we were putting their favorite flowar with a ribbon saying their name by our unity candle since traditionally they are the one who light the clandles for us to unite. My mom’s was a red rose and my fiance’s mother’s was a lavender calla lilly

April 25, 2011 at 10:58 am
(127) A says:

I’m getting married in 5 months and my dad passed away 10 months ago. The ideas are nice, but I think I’ll do better not putting some special thing up or anything like that. I think it will only make things worse. The video we will have at the reception prior to our dance will have pics and will make things hard enough.

May 12, 2011 at 12:20 am
(128) Meshell says:

This site has been very helpful. My daughter is getting married in a few days. Her dad passed away suddenly five months ago. My brother will walk her down the aisle. We are having a vase with flowers and candle placed up front with a picture beside it. We will either have his mother light the candle right before she comes down the aisle or she will light it right before they light the unity candle. The florist is also making her a flower arrangement matching her bouquet to place on his grave the day of the ceremony.

May 12, 2011 at 11:54 am
(129) weddings says:

Administrator’s Note: In order to keep all the great ideas together, I’m closing the comments on this post. To share your ideas, please go to Honoring the Dead at Your Wedding: User Answers

July 1, 2011 at 8:55 am
(130) Holly says:

my brother passed away 4 years ago. and he was my best friend. we are having a empty seat at the head table with his picture on the table to represent him being a groomsman in which he would have been…

we are also ready a poem at the ceremony that i had written for him.. and they at the reception for all our grandparents and my fiances uncle who passed away we will be having a table set up with all of there pictures.

July 25, 2011 at 5:26 pm
(131) Jen says:

My father passed away two months ago and I get married in about two months from now. We are going to have my parents’ wedding photo and my fiance’s parents’ wedding photo along with a photo of the two of us at the place card table. I like old photos, and this way it will be like he is there with us, and we don’t have to do anything too overt to upset everyone.

October 9, 2011 at 4:47 pm
(132) John says:

My wife to be lost her mum when she was aged 17. I have been with my fiancé for 6 years and she rarely talks of her mum. At her brothers wedding two years ago he mentioned how lovely his mum was etc and this had my fiancé in tears during his speech.
It’s obvious my fiancé still finds it difficult to talk of her mum too often but I would like to include her mum innour day in a subtle way if possible. I like the idea of a tiny photo charm attached to my fiancé’s bouquet and it’s a plan to maybe give that to her via a bridesmaid on our big day in the morning. Not sure if this would make her too emotional and upset though, any other ideas would be much appreciated.

December 10, 2011 at 12:54 am
(133) Bride to be says:

I am getting married in 9 weeks. My fiancee’s mother passed away 10 months ago. In loving memory of her I have decided to incorporate her favourite flower – orchids. My future father in-law and my fiancee will wear orchids and I will have orchids in my bouquet with roses.. It will be a difficult day however, I am glad she was able to see us get Engaged… :(

January 5, 2012 at 3:23 pm
(134) jeordtrey says:

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January 13, 2012 at 3:51 pm
(135) Tamara says:

My best friends father passed away about a year ago and she is getting married in tow months. I am not sure if I should mention him in the speech or not and if so, what should I say?

February 25, 2012 at 1:45 am
(136) Abigail P. says:

Hi! I am thirteen, so it’s very obvious that I’m not getting married any time soon, but my Father died when I was nine, and I like to dream about my big day, so I googled ways to remember a deceased father on your wedding day, which brought me here!
I’ve read all these ideas, and I like a few of them! When I get married I’d like to incorporate my Dad in a special way, being that he and I were as close as we could get: best friends!
Well, I stumbled upon this idea, which I like very much, elsewhere, and I thought I’d post it, and let you guys know too: you could take a piece of fabric, say from a shirt your father wore, or a handkerchief, (ect) and sew it into your dress, in say, a heart. I loved that one, and I think it may happen in my wedding.
Another one that I found completely unique and wonderful is this: taking small photos (say, locket necklace size) of your father, and connecting them to your high heel (or whatever shoe you plan to wear that day) so they can “walk you down the aisle” in a sense. I loved that one too!
Hope I gave someone some inspiration, and thank you!
God bless,
~Abigail.

May 24, 2012 at 4:09 pm
(137) Tara says:

My mother passed away 6 years ago. Of course this is a day that every daughter wants to be able to share with her mother. My mother has six sisters and I am asking them all to wear a certain color and they walk down the aisle. Also all of my wedding flowers are carnations, one reason my mother alwasys would give me carnations on my birthday, she would send them to school to me. Also of course I am going to have a memory candle beacause my finace’ father passed away years and years ago. I feel this is how I am going to acknowledge my mother and my fiance’ father on our special day

June 8, 2012 at 1:05 am
(138) Marissa says:

My mom is getting married this year and her mother (my grandmother) and I were very,very close and she was close with my little niece and nephews. You know we explained to them that Grandma would be there in spirit and they asked how she would know where the wedding was and when it was, etc. So we said they could release balloons as they walk down the aisle (they’re the ring bearer and flower girl).

July 21, 2012 at 9:28 am
(139) grieving heart says:

My father past away when I was 15. Now here I am 30 and getting married to a man I know my father would approve. You know it’s meant to be when your fiance’s father’s birthday is on the day of my father’s death.

July 24, 2012 at 3:15 pm
(140) Emily Rose says:

My father passed away 6 years ago and I have been going crazy trying to think of ways to honor his memory at our wedding. My fiance and I are to be married August 2013 and all these comments have been so helpful. I’m going to have my father’s class ring on a ribbon wrapped around my bouquet, and my paternal grandfather will be giving me away at the ceremony. Thanks again for all the helpful insight.

August 16, 2012 at 3:50 am
(141) love quotes says:

Tasteful depictions of love basically are too magnificent.
I love quotations that connect to love as they manage to aim for built-in dreams inside each of
us quite adequately. It’s sort of strange how whenever I browse love quotes. I get overcome with emotion, particularly the depressing quotes. Take care of yourselves!

September 26, 2012 at 11:37 am
(142) kim says:

My sister died 11 years ago. I got married 2 weeks ago and my best friend and MOH left a single white rose on each ceremony chair “For Kim’s sister, Angie, the maid of honor, who is here with us in spirit.”
I was speechless….it was unbelievable

March 4, 2013 at 8:52 am
(143) Jesse says:

My mom died three months before my wedding. Her and I were super close, so what I have decided to do was where a special flower for her and during the mother son dance I will dance with my sister.

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