Who Pays for the Bridesmaids' Dresses?

Etiquette experts answer this—and other—burning questions related to wedding party fashion.

Bridesmaids in Black Gowns Looking at Bride in Strapless Wedding Dress

Photo by Rêver Weddings

If you've been asked to be part of the bridal party for a close friend or family member's wedding, congratulations are in order! Taking on this honorary role is undeniably exciting, but it can also get pretty costly. Between events like the bridal shower and bachelorette party and fixed costs like hair and makeup and accommodations, bridesmaids often spend a significant chunk of change to be part of the celebration. Another line item that you'll have to consider? The bridesmaid dress. That begs the question: Who is typically responsible for the cost of bridesmaids' dresses? Should the bride all of the bridal party's dresses, or do the bridesmaids buy their own gowns? Who should foot the bill for alteration costs, and what happens if one of the attendants doesn't have the budget for her attire?

Everything related to what the bridal party pays for can get tricky, so we had wedding etiquette experts Diane Gottsman and Gabriella Risatti weigh in to answer all of your burning bridesmaids' dress questions.

Meet the Expert

  • Diane Gottsman is a national etiquette expert and author, as well as the founder of The Protocol School of Texas.
  • Gabriella Risatti is the founder of Gabriella New York Bridal Salon. Prior to opening her bridal boutique in 2008, she spent a decade working in the buying offices of fashion labels including Ralph Lauren and Calvin Klein.

Here, the pros break down who traditionally pays for bridesmaids' dresses, the average cost of attire, and what to do if the cost of a gown just isn't in the budget.

Who Pays for the Bridesmaids' Dresses?

According to Risatti, old-school rules regarding who pays for bridesmaids' dresses have gone out the window. If the bride can afford to, it's a very thoughtful gesture for her to pay for the dress or a portion of the cost for each of her bridesmaids. "We’ve seen more brides paying for their bridesmaids' dresses, especially if they pick a more expensive dress for their attendants to wear," she says.

While generous, that's still an exception to the norm. Generally speaking, bridesmaids are expected to pay for their own dresses and accessories; they may also be required to foot the bill for hair and makeup appointments and transportation to the wedding. According to Gottsman, bridesmaids should be prepared to cover the costs for these expenses once they accept the offer. That being said, it's the bride's responsibility to let everyone know about all upcoming financial responsibilities from the get-go, and bridesmaids should be honest and upfront if they'll be under a monetary strain.

How Much Do Bridesmaids' Dresses Typically Cost?

Given the various expenses your bridesmaids will be taking on in the lead-up to your wedding, it's essential that brides carefully consider the cost of the bridesmaids' dresses as well as everyone's heights and body types when choosing wedding-day ensembles. Gottsman says bridesmaids' dresses can range anywhere from $100 to upwards of $800. "It all depends on how lavish the wedding is, and the stores you go to shop," she notes.

As you browse gowns, choose styles that are flattering, comfortable, and within an agreed upon budget. The cost of being a bridesmaid is often at the heart of any conflicts that may arise between brides and their attendants, and the last thing you want is for your bridesmaids to be upset or frustrated about having to shell out a ton of cash on a dress they will never wear again.

What If a Bridesmaid Can't Afford a Dress?

If a member of the bridal party isn't able to foot the bill for the bridesmaid dress, Risatti recommends that the engaged couple step in to help cover the cost and work that expense into their wedding budget, if possible. However, this should be a private matter so that the other bridesmaids don't feel slighted. Risatti also suggests that brides pick their bridesmaid dresses as early as possible so that each of the 'maids will have the maximum amount of time to save up for the gown. Additionally, check to see if the store selling the gowns offers a payment plan.

If the dress still isn't a feasible option for one or more of your bridesmaids, consider shopping for a similar look that costs much less. "While you wouldn’t want to sacrifice style, there are a lot of great, affordable bridesmaid dress options out there, so it’s worth looking," says Risatti.

Alternatively, opting for mismatched bridesmaids' dresses opens up a whole new world of options: If the bridesmaids are each selecting different gowns within the same color scheme, it's also likely easier to find a pretty, flattering style that doesn't break the bank. "You get to be more flexible," says Gottsman. "Or, someone might already have one hanging in their closet that fits the bill perfectly."

If all options have been exhausted and you're still at an impasse, the bridesmaid may need to take on a different role within the wedding. She could give a reading at the ceremony or help greet guests, notes Risatti, which will make her feel involved without having to splurge on a pricey dress.

more in

The Ultimate Guide to Bridesmaid Dress Shopping

Related Stories