Ask Nina: Honoring Both Father and Stepfather
Tuesday September 6, 2005
In this week's Ask Nina column, reader Elaine McKenzie writes:
"We are in a quandary and would like your thoughts. Both father and stepfather have a close relationship with me, and I don't know what to do! It's tradition for a father to walk his daughter down the aisle, but my step-dad has played a very important role in my life, and I love him dearly. I want him to have a prominent role too. What do you think, and how could I make this work?"
Click here to read my answer.
There are many different ways to honor relatives in your ceremony. If everyone is comfortable with it, you could ask one of your fathers to walk you halfway down the aisle, where you will meet the second one, who will escort you the rest of the way. Or, if your reception aisle is wide enough, both fathers could escort you the whole way. If you worry that your birth father will feel slighted by such solutions, then perhaps there is another role for your stepfather, such as a special reading. You could do a family rose ceremony, where you give each parent a rose, or do a variation on a unity candle ceremony. And last, but not least, you could choose to walk down the aisle solo so as to not honor one over the other. I hope you find a solution that works for everyone!
If you have a question for the Ask Nina column, write weddings.guide@about.com.
"We are in a quandary and would like your thoughts. Both father and stepfather have a close relationship with me, and I don't know what to do! It's tradition for a father to walk his daughter down the aisle, but my step-dad has played a very important role in my life, and I love him dearly. I want him to have a prominent role too. What do you think, and how could I make this work?"
Click here to read my answer.
There are many different ways to honor relatives in your ceremony. If everyone is comfortable with it, you could ask one of your fathers to walk you halfway down the aisle, where you will meet the second one, who will escort you the rest of the way. Or, if your reception aisle is wide enough, both fathers could escort you the whole way. If you worry that your birth father will feel slighted by such solutions, then perhaps there is another role for your stepfather, such as a special reading. You could do a family rose ceremony, where you give each parent a rose, or do a variation on a unity candle ceremony. And last, but not least, you could choose to walk down the aisle solo so as to not honor one over the other. I hope you find a solution that works for everyone!
If you have a question for the Ask Nina column, write weddings.guide@about.com.


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