Nicholas Cage and Alice Kim "Barely Not Jailbait" Wedding
July 30, 2004When Nicholas Cage married Lisa Marie Presley, Hollywood tongues wagged. But jaws hit the floor when they found out he had married a 19-year-old waitress. The wedding took place only five months after they met, when she was his waitress at Los Angeles sushi restaurant. He had to get her mother's permission before their first date, and had to officially divorce Lisa Marie Presley before they could marry.
What they did right: Since we know little about the wedding itself, let's just say at least they believe in love! They also reportedly honeymooned at the beautiful island of Corsica.
What was so outrageous: What in the world do they have in common? What could their relationship possibly be built on? How can you marry someone so different from you in every way, after only knowing them for five months? I could go on with the questions, but instead I think I'll just sit here dumbfounded, waiting for their divorce. Is that too cynical?
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"Drunk in Las Vegas Part II": Nikki Hilton and Todd Meister's Wedding
August 15, 2004Okay, so technically there's no evidence that they were drunk. But you do the math – Las Vegas, 2:30 am, only your sister and a b-list actress present. They tried hard to make the public believe this was a real wedding. In an interview with E! Online, their publicist used the word "serious" over and over again to describe their wedding. He even went so far as to say "any resemblance between this wedding and Britney Spears' 55-hour Vegas debacle last January is purely coincidental." Yes, the Hilton-Meister marriage lasted almost three months – that's 83 more days than Britney's! Incredible.
What they did right: The Hilton sisters are always looking for publicity, and this was a surefire way. And, even without a prenuptial agreement, they managed to get it annulled quickly.
What was so outrageous: A quickie Vegas wedding, a 20-year-old heiress, an older man, no prenup, no taste. Actually, come to think of it, none of this is outrageous as a month without a Hilton publicity stunt would be.
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Rosie O'Donnell and Kelli Carpenter "Stand Up for Your Rights" Wedding
February 26, 2004To be honest, I debated including Rosie and Kelli in this list. After all, what is so outrageous about a long-term couple who already have children together deciding to make things official? But then again, not every wedding is a political act, and not every bride denounces a president's "vile and hateful words" during her wedding speech. They say they decided to marry after they were denied spousal privilege during the Rosie magazine trial, making all of their personal conversations admissible to the record. Theirs wasn’t the romance-and-flowers wedding most brides want, but then again, they aren't most brides.
What they did right: I applaud them for standing up for themselves and what they believe in, even at the risk of a high-profile career.
What was so outrageous: Nothing they did is as outrageous as the fact that Nikki Hilton's and Britney Spears's weddings were legal, and Rosie and Kelli's wedding wasn't.
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Joey Fatone and Kelly Baldwin "Love Can Last, Even in Hollywood" Wedding
September 7, 2004When most people dream of being famous, they don't think about leaving their loved ones behind, and yet that's often what happens. When one member of a couple achieves fame, the differences between them can seem insurmountable; the temptations too great. Joey Fatone and Kelly Baldwin have beaten those odds. They started dating in high school, and ten years later, they have a beautiful 3-year old daughter and a successful relationship. They wed in a chateau on Long Island, surrounded by family and friends, including Fatone's N'Sync bandmates.
What they did right: Joey and Kelli really personalized their wedding. They had all the things they wanted, including a mini amusement park, performances from musician friends, and a guitar that guests signed instead of a guest book. Most importantly, they had a blast at their own wedding.
What was so outrageous: Even this skeptical writer's heart is gladdened, yet surprised, to see a Cinderella story in Hollywood.
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